Article 17825 of alt.tasteless:
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From: davros@triton.unm.edu (Seymour Butt)
Newsgroups: alt.tasteless
Subject: Uses for Fuck
Message-ID: <!q3qaqm@lynx.unm.edu>
Date: 3 Dec 92 20:10:58 GMT
Organization: University of New Mexico, Albuquerque
Lines: 56


                          FUCK YOU
     PERHAPS ONE OF THE MOST INTERESTING AND COLORFUL WORDS IN THE ENGLISH
LANGUAGE TODAY IS THE WORD "FUCK". IT IS THE ONE MAGICAL WORD, WHICH, JUST BY
ITS SOUND, CAN DESCRIBE PAIN, PLEASURE, LOVE, AND HATE. IN LANGUAGE, "FUCK"
FALLS INTO MANY GRAMATICAL CATEGORIES. IT CAN BE USED AS A VERB, BOTH TRANSITIVE (JOHN FUCKED MARY) AND INTRANSITIVE (MARY WAS FUCKED BY JOHN). IT CAN BE AN ACTION VERB (JOHN REALLY GIVES A FUCK) OR AS A PASSIVE VERB(MARY DOESN'T REALLY GIVE A FUCK) OR AS AN ADVERB(MARY IS FUCKING INTERESTED IN JOHN) OR AS A NOUN (MARY IS A TERRIFIC FUCK). IT CAN ALSO BE USED AS AN ADJECTIVE(MARY IS FUCKING BEAUTIFUL). AS YOU CAN SEE, THERE ARE FEW WORDS WITH THE OVERALL VERSATILITY OF "FUCK".

     BESIDES ITS SEXUAL CONNOTATIONS, THIS INCREDIBLE WORD CAN BE USED TO
DESCRIBE MANY SITUATIONS:

1. GREETINGS          "HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU?"
2. FRAUD              "I GOT FUCKED BY THE CAR DEALER."
3. DISMAY             "OH, FUCK IT!"
4. TROUBLE            "I GUESS I'M FUCKED NOW."
5. AGGRESSION         "FUCK YOU!"
6. DISGUST            "FUCK ME."
7. CONFUSION          "WHAT THE FUCK.......?"
8. DIFFICULTY         "I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS FUCKING BUSINESS!"
9. DESPAIR            "FUCKED AGAIN!"
10. INCOMPETENCE      "HE FUCKS UP EVERYTHING."
11. DISPLEASURE       "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?"
12. LOST              "WHERE THE FUCK ARE WE?"
13. DISBELIEF         "UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE!"
14. RETALIATION       "UP YOUR FUCKING ASS!"

IT CAN BE USED IN AN ANATOMICAL DESCRIPTION-"HE'S A FUCKING ASSHOLE."
IT CAN BE USED TO TELL TIME-"IT'S FIVE FUCKING THIRTY."
IT CAN BE USED IN BUSINESS-"HOW DID I WIND UP WITH THIS FUCKING JOB?"
IT CAN BE MATERNAL-AS IN "MOTHERFUCKER."
IT CAN BE POLITICAL-"FUCK DAN QUAYLE!"

AND NEVER FORGET GENERAL CUSTER'S LAST WORDS: "WHERE DID ALL THESE FUCKING
     INDIANS COME FROM?"
ALSO, THE FAMOUS LAST WORDS OF THE MAYOR OF HIROSHIMA: "WHAT THE FUCK WAS
     THAT?!"
AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST, THE IMMORTAL WORDS OF THE CAPTAIN OF THE TITANIC, WHO
     SAID: "WHERE IS ALL THIS FUCKING WATER COMING FROM?!"

     THE MIND FAIRLY BOGGLES AT THE MANY CREATIVE USES OF THE WORD. HOW CAN
ANYBODY BE OFFENDED WHEN YOU SAY "FUCK?" USE IT FREQUENTLY IN YOUR DAILY SPEECH
IT WILL ADD TO YOUR PRESTIGE.
                     TODAY SAY TO SOMEONE.........

                           "FUCK YOU!"


-- 
***       MY EMAIL: davros@triton.unm.edu                                   ***
                           You are soft, like all Time Lords.
                                       -- Davros, "Resurrection of the Daleks".