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Hell or MS Windows?


                          Well, I'll Be Damned
                          ====================
 
    by John Walker --  kelvin@fourmilab.ch
 
            The top ten reasons Eternal Damnation is better
                   than Windows Software Development
 
       Eternal Damnation                     Windows Development
 =============================         ==============================
 
                                 - 10 -
 
 It never ends.                        You think you're almost done,
                                       but you never really finish.
 
                                 - 9 -
 
 You burn forever, but are not         Each update introduces new
 consumed.                             and improved tortures, which
                                       slowly consume you.
 
                                 - 8 -
 
 Your fate is in the hands of          Your fate is in the hands of
 Satan, Prince of Darkness.            Gates, Prince of Incompatibility.
 
                                 - 7 -
 
 Satan gives you something you         Gates makes you buy Windows 95.
 want in return for being damned.
 
                                 - 6 -
 
 It is avoidable; an attractive,       Resistance is futile.  All the
 widely-marketed alternative is        alternatives are damned or
 available.                            doomed.
 
                                 - 5 -
 
 It is free.                           You pay, and pay, and pay just
                                       to stay in the game.
 
                                 - 4 -
 
 Satan was once an angel.              Gates started by writing a BASIC
                                       interpreter.
 
                                 - 3 -
 
 Hell has no Windows.                  Microsoft does.
 
                                 - 2 -
 
 You only pass the Gates of Hell       The Gates of Microsoft keeps
 one time.                             popping up everywhere you look.
 
                             AND NUMBER ONE:

 Satan genuinely believes in the       Gates just does it for the money.
 triumph of Evil.


  Melissa D. Binde [ ]