Apologies to those unfamiliar with baseball, and those who thought this was a 'Fallen _E_mpires' sneak peek:

Beanball
1B
Instant
Target creature is removed from play. Select one of your creatures to be buried.

Bench-Clearing Brawl
1BB
Sorcery
All creatures in play are buried.

Nine Men Out
2BB
Sorcery
All of your opponent's creatures are tapped except one creature of your opponent's choice.

Double Switch
1U
Instant
Target tapped creature of yours becomes untapped. Target untapped creature of yours becomes tapped.

Roster Expansion
1UU
Enchantment
When Roster Expansion is cast, draw 6 cards. Skip your discard phase if your hand has fewer than 13 cards. Roster Expansion may only be cast after September 1.

Wrigley Field
1U
Enchant World
No creature or spell with 'Night' in its name may be played. (Yeah, yeah, I KNOW they have lights there now. So sue me.)

Pinch Hitter
1G
Instant
Bury any one of your attacking creatures. Place into play from your hand any creature of equal or lesser casting cost. Treat this creature as if it were the one who originally participated in the attack. Play after defense is chosen.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, your attention please. Now batting for Serra Angel is The Wretched."

Relief Pitcher
1G
Instant
Bury any one of your creatures. Place into play from your hand any creature of equal or lesser casting cost. Treat this creature as if it were just summoned.

Angels in the Outfield
1WW
Enchantment
1: give any one of your creatures the flying ability until end of turn. Only one of your creatures at a time may be made flying in this manner.

Astroturf
1WW
Enchant World
All creatures gain the plainswalk ability.

I came up with these in about 10 minutes. Please, I beg of you, stop me before I can think of more!

Career-Ending Injury
2BBB
Sorcery
Target creature is removed from play.

Corked Bat
1B
Enchant Creature
Target creature gains +3/+1. Each time target creature attacks, roll 2d6. If a 2 or 3 is rolled, Corked Bat is buried and creature is tapped and does not untap for your next 2 untap phases.

Bat Boy
1G
Summon Really Really Lucky Kid
1/1
Tap: return one of your Corked Bat enchantments to your hand. When a 3 is rolled to discover a Corked Bat, tap to cancel its effect and return the Corked Bat in question to your hand.

Infield In
1R
Enchantment
1: all your defending creatures gain +0/+2. Any damage you take from attacking creatures this turn is doubled.

Double Play
1W
Instant
Remove two attacking creatures from the attack. Treat these creatures as if they never attacked.

Reconstructive Surgery
W
Sorcery
Place any of your creatures that has been removed from the game into your graveyard.

Dave Pallone
UW
Summon Legend
2/2
Tap: redirect up to two points of damage from you or one of your creatures to Dave Pallone. Dave Pallone does not untap for your next two untap phases if tapped in this manner.

Gaylord Perry
1UB
Summon Legend
3/3
Pay UB during upkeep or Gaylord Perry is tapped and does not untap during your next untap.
UB,Tap: Tap target creature.

Minnie Minoso
BW
Summon Legend
2/2
Minnie Minoso is not removed from play if he is the target of a Beanball.

Nolan Ryan
2URW
Summon Elder Pitching Legend
4/5
Tap: Tap target creature.

Reggie Jackson
3GU
Summon Elder Hitting Legend
5/4
Tap: destroy opposing Legend. This ability may only be used during October.

Thanks to Blake Tucker (crighton@leland.Stanford.EDU) for coming up with the Fallen Umpires name, and for suggesting that I do a Dave Pallone card.

>From CLEWIS@pslibm.psl.nmsu.edu Wed Jul 27 12:51 EST 1994

Appeal
Instant
UU
Place two counters on target creature. Adverse side effects on target creature from Fallen Umpire cards are nullified while Appeal counters are on creature. Remove 1 counter per controller's upkeep. When the last counter is removed, roll 2d6. On a result of 12, the adverse effect is completely nullified.